Friday, December 18, 2009

Five Reasons Remakes Stink

Category: Opinion

A recent flop of a remake of a classic television series inspired this blog about five remakes that never should have been.

The Prisoner -- Patrick McGoohan created and starred in a 16-part show that, to this day, people are at a loss to categorize: was it drama? Science fiction? Mystery? Dry British comedy? Who cared, it was a masterpiece, one of the greatest television series in history. So, naturally, the legions of fans the original had made it rife for a remake. The 2009 A&E series owed far more to the original film Rollerball than the original Prisoner: a corporation controlling everything (remember that "corporate anthem" that played before the Rollerball games began?) to the point where Jonathan E....er...."Six" can see what's going on; as opposed to the mysterious nature of just who ran the Village ("that would be telling," was the reply when McGoohan's Number Six asked, "Who's side are you on?"). And, of course, it was all filmed with typical music video 0.0385 second-per-shot editing. One of the rovers from the original series should have headed this remake off at the pass.

The Electric Company -- the PBS show that taught kids to read in the 1970s was equally popular with older people because of its Vaudeville format. The remake is more episodic -- and boring. No J. Arthur Crank, no Rita Moreno yelling "Hey, you guyyyyyyyys!", no Morgan Freeman as Easy Reader, and no superb cameos (my favorite: after a cartoon featuring the joke about "there's a banana in your ear" with the reply, "I can't hear you, there's a banana in my ear," Lorne Greene popped in and said, "I can't hear you, there's a Bonanza in my ear!"). If the boy in "Love of Chair" (the first season lampoon of soap operas) had seen the remake, the script would have read, "The boy is throwing up."

Randall and Hopkirk (Deceased) -- speaking of ITC shows (the company that produced The Prisoner), another charming program from the British vaults was 1969's Randall and Hopkirk (Deceased) (which aired here in syndication in the mid-70s as My Partner the Ghost). The series rubbed out one of the main characters before the second commercial break (hence the "deceased" part), but fear not, Marty Hopkirk spent the rest of the 26 episodes as a ghost that only his private detective agency partner Jeff Randall could see. When the series was remade in the early 2000s it starred the British comedy team of Vic Reeves (as the ghost) and Bob Mortimer (as Jeff). The computer-generated special effects were a major improvement from the 1960s wire and pulleys to move objects (some of which were plainly visible in the scenes) and "Pepper's ghost" effects to make Marty walk through walls. The plots, however, were mostly rehashes of the original series -- and bad rehashes at that. To be fair, when the remake went for originality it showed definite promise; however, that was too few and too far between to keep fans of the original series and fans of Reeves & Mortimer interested for more than 13 episodes before it joined Marty Hopkirk in death.

AfterM*A*S*H -- M*A*S*H lasted about three seasons too long to begin with, so there was no way AfterM*A*S*H was going to relive the glory of the heyday of the legendary series. We really were ready to give the series up. Unfortunately, CBS didn't realize this until after they subjected us to this hunk of junk.

Burke's Law -- the original, starring the late Gene Barry, was one of the best TV series ever despite its absolute ridiculous plot (a millionaire police homicide captain today would make everyone yell "kickbacks!"). In the mid-90s this show was revived, this time with Barry as an octogenarian. Lightning did not land in the bottle the second time around, and it was wrong to think it would to begin with. Runner-up goes to Amos Burke, Secret Agent, which was ABC taking a very good thing -- and ruining it by trying to turn Burke's Law into something along the lines of "The Millionaire Police Homicide Captain from U.N.C.L.E."

And I'm going out on a limb here to add one that I am almost certain will be on this list this time next year:

The Green Hornet -- given the track record of TV shows that become movies, I am not holding my breath in anticipation of a masterpiece of this forthcoming (Christmas 2010) film version of the TV series. One of the great things about the television series (and the movie serials before it) was that Britt Reid, as a rich man, could afford gadgets that "regular folks" could not, things that gave him an edge in his crime fighting. It's the 21st century now, we all have the gadgets. Worst of all, the movie will not have what the TV series had that made it special: Bruce Lee.

Friday, December 11, 2009

It's Burke's Law

Category: Obituary/News

You just cannot beat a plot like this: a millionaire L.A. police homicide captain who's a playboy gets chauffeured to the scene of every crime in a Rolls. That was Burke's Law, the intelligent and extremely funny series that aired in the early 1960s. Gene Barry played Amos Burke, the captain who usually found his date interrupted by a phone call from one of his detectives, asking him to come to the scene of a murder. Every episode's title began "Who Killed..." Sometimes the answer was obvious; other times it was a total surprise.

Gene Barry died December 9 at a retirement home, apparently of natural causes.

Barry played many other roles in his life -- Bat Masterson, Glenn Howard in The Name of the Game, and Gene Talbot in Our Miss Brooks. But there was nothing like Amos Burke -- not before, not since.

Gene Barry was 90.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Americana 101

Category: 50 Songs to Hear

SONG: Starting Tomorrow
ARTIST: Marshall Crenshaw
SONGWRITER: Marshall Crenshaw
ALBUM: Life's Too Short
YEAR/LABEL: 1991; MCA

I guess that, if I had to explain my stuff, one thing I'd say about it is that what I usually present on my records is a guitar-dominated soundscape.
(Marshall Crenshaw)

When Marshall Crenshaw first burst onto the scene in 1982 people were doing a lot of physical comparisons. He had played John Lennon in a production of Beatlemania and also had a Buddy Holly look about him (he later would play Holly in the film La Bamba). Musically, however,
the only person Marshall Crenshaw could be compared to was Marshall Crenshaw.

His first album yielded a minor hit ("Someday, Someway") and songs for others to cover (blues singer Lou Ann Barton covered "Brand New Lover" on her 1982 album that was produced by Glenn Frey).
Most importantly, it produced some of the absolute best music of the early 80s and ushered in a "roots-rock" sound that relied more on guitars and less on synthesizers. It also introduced the world to one of the best performers in American rock and roll.

Crenshaw quickly faded into "cult star" status, which is too bad for those who have yet to discover his talents. He popped out album after album of music that was good, great, or memorable. Falling in the latter category: 1991's exceptional Life's Too Short album. Shining as a gem from that album is the mid-tempo ballad "Starting Tomorrow."

The song begins with a marvelous line: "Starting tomorrow, if this night ever ends." That line evokes something everyone can relate to, from students to people sitting in the waiting room of a hospital. In this case Crenshaw is waiting for the new day so he can get off the road and go home to his family. "All night long it seems like time was running slow," he complains, and the listener empathizes completely. The wait that never seems to conclude has a pay-off: "I'll feel more alive as soon as I'm not alone." Crenshaw is torn between being a touring musician ("the feeling in my heart that won't let me settle down") and a family man ("it only comes around and bothers me when I'm away from you"). He's not the first performer to feel these conflicting feelings and he won't be the last; however, he did one of the greatest jobs of articulating the pain.

The world needs more rockers like Marshall Crenshaw. Thankfully, we have Crenshaw himself.

OTHER MARSHALL CRENSHAW MUSIC TO INVESTIGATE:

The entire Life's Too Short album
-- great music from start to finish with warnings about consuming too much ("Stop Doing That," "Better Back Off") highlighting the album.

The entire Marshall Crenshaw album -- the debut album that nearly everyone wishes they could make as their opening statement. "Rockin' Around in NYC" should have been a major hit.

"I'm Sorry (But So is Brenda Lee)" (from Downtown) -- with a title like that, one would expect something from the Homer & Jethro discography, but the cover of a Ben Vaughn song is actually a break-up tune that is as good as the title is clever.

"You Should've Been There" (from Good Evening) -- this song that is thematically similar to Porter Wagoner's "I Thought I Heard You Calling My Name" features backing vocals by the BoDeans (who co-wrote "Radio Girl" on the same album).



PREVIOUS SONGS:

(Country)
Rock of Ages, Hide Thou Me
Playboy
Our Town
Old Memories Mean Nothing to Me
Not That I Care
Nobody Eats at Linebaugh's Anymore
My Book of Memories
Lost to a Stranger
A Little Bitty Heart
Life Has Its Little Ups and Downs
Life is Too Short
I Want a Home in Dixie
I Lost Today
Fingerprints
Down to the River to Pray
Don't Let the Stars Get in Your Eyeballs
A Death in the Family
Dark as a Dungeon
Bottomless Well

(Rock)
Spellbound
Sleep's Dark and Silent Gate
She's a Runaway
Painted Bells
Out to Sea
One More Song
New Delhi Freight Train
Millworker
Long Way Home
Island
Heart of Rome
Harriet Tubman's Gonna Carry Me Home
Entella Hotel
Desperados Under the Eaves
Crossing Muddy Waters
Cliffs of Dooneen
Bruised Orange (Chain of Sorrow)
Baby Mine

Monday, November 2, 2009

One of the Finest Harmonica Players in Rock Passes

Category: Obituary/News

Norton Buffalo made a few records on his own (1977's Loving in the Valley of the Moon was particularly good) but he spent most of his career standing in the shadows of Steve Miller -- and frequently upstaging him. Buffalo could flat-out play the harmonica.

Norton Buffalo died Friday, October 30 of advanced lung cancer that had spread to his brain.

Buffalo stepped into the limelight when he began working with Steve Miller about the time Miller's career took off with The Joker, Fly Like an Eagle, and Book of Dreams. Miller got Buffalo a contract at Capitol and produced two albums (Lovin' in the Valley of the Moon and Desert Horizon) for him.

Aside from his work with Steve Miller he was the session harmonica player for a number of blues/rock acts (as the video of him with Bonnie Raitt shows).

Norton Buffalo was 58 (although Steve Miller's web site posted his age as 55).

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

THE Cult Band of Our Time

Category: 50 Songs to Hear

SONG: Spellbound
ARTIST: Poco
SONGWRITER: Rusty Young
ALBUM: Legend
YEAR/LABEL: 1978; ABC

We've been together longer than any of our marriages.
(Paul Cotton)

Jethro Burns once quoted his father as saying of Homer and Jethro's early career, "You boys are about as unlucky as a one-legged man at an ass-kicking contest." Looking at the long career of Poco, one can only wonder if a member's father made that assessment of them as well. Poco was the pioneering band of the genre that would become known as "country-rock" in the late 60s and early 70s, forming before Gram Parsons joined the Byrds and made the landmark Sweetheart of the Rodeo album, and singing "there's just a little bit of magic in the country music we're singing" long before the Eagles even dreamed of takin' it easy -- or had even moved to California. The Eagles eventually became the epitome of "country-rock" and in the process acquired both their bassists from Poco (Randy Meisner played bass on Poco's first album but left before the album artwork was done, relegating his mention to a footnote in the credits) while enjoying a hall of fame career
. Meanwhile, Poco put out album after album of great music, most of which sold a tiny fraction of the Eagles' records.

Ironically, after spending most of the 1970s in the shadows of the far more successful (and lyrically cynical) Eagles, it was the long hiatus that the Eagles took after the monstrous success of Hotel California -- and the departure of Timothy Schmit from Poco to replace Randy Meisner in the Eagles as he had done in 1968 for Poco -- that gave Poco an opening to score their biggest commercial success, 1978's "Crazy Love" from the album Legend. The album eventually sold nearly two million copies while Schmit was sitting in a studio in Miami recording the follow-up to Hotel California (1979's The Long Run, the last Eagles studio album for almost three decades), leading Glenn Frey and Don Henley to joke that Schmit may have left his former band right at the wrong time.

"Crazy Love" is a superlative song, one of the few numbers that became the best-known song for a "cult status" act that was actually deserving of the success (think of the best-known songs by acts like Jimmy Buffett, Warren Zevon, and Steve Forbert as examples of the opposite being true). One song that was overlooked on Legend that certainly should not have is "Spellbound." The song's title is a good indication of what the tune does to its listener.

The lyrics paint a lovely opening picture. The sound of crickets compliment the first line, "There's an easy evening breeze moving softly through the trees." The lyrics continue to weave a spell of spine-tingling lines ("she's got me hanging my a heartbeat") and meanders between first-person and third-person to suggest that this type of love (deemed "crazy" in that big hit on side two of the album) hits everyone at some point.

Poco has existed for over forty years in various incarnations. They have lost many famous members (Richie Furay, Jim Messinia, and the two bassists) and have seen music change so much that even their more rock-based songs would never find a home on country radio because they would be labeled "too country," yet they endure. As of this writing, original drummer George Grantham has recovered significantly from a stroke suffered onstage in July of 2004 but is unable to drum.

Country-rock would not exist without Poco, and if for no other reason than that they belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. .

OTHER POCO MUSIC TO INVESTIGATE:

(This is one band I truly want to say "get everything of theirs.")

The entire Rose of Cimarron album -- they should sue Emmylou Harris for what she did to the title track. Songs like "P.N.S. (When You Come Around)" and "Too Many Nights Too Long" make this one of Poco's best albums.

The entire Indian Summer album -- and then there's Rose of Cimarron's follow-up, the last album Timothy Schmit played on before leaving for the Eagles. What an album to go out on. The title track is one of the best songs of the 1970s, period.

The entire Cantamos album -- Richie Furay left after Crazy Eyes and Poco recorded a clunker (Seven). They rebounded beautifully with this marvelous album.

The entire Head Over Heels album -- the closest thing to a hit Poco had before "Crazy Love" is "Keep on Tryin'" off this album. Other gems such as their rendition of a song penned by Walter Becker and Donald Fagen ("Dallas") and a lovely tune about New Orleans ("Down in the Quarter") make this worth owning.

"Brass Buttons" (from Crazy Eyes) -- a lovely rendition of Gram Parsons' song.


Friday, October 16, 2009

The Sound of One Heart Breaking

Category: 50 Songs to Hear

SONG: Sleep's Dark and Silent Gate
ARTIST: Jackson Browne
SONGWRITER: Jackson Browne
ALBUM: The Pretender
YEAR/LABEL: 1976; Asylum

The perception was that I wrote an album about my wife's death, which was not true. If you want to listen to "Sleep's Dark and Silent Gate" or "The Pretender" or "Your Bright Baby Blues" -- they're not about somebody dying.
(Jackson Browne)

Many performers emerged from the "singer/songwriter" era of the late 1960s and early 1970s. A number of them either came from or were based in southern California (e.g., David Blue, who wrote "Outlaw Man" on the Eagles' Desperado album, Warren Zevon, Randy Newman, J.D. Souther, and James Taylor), to the point where critics of the music labeled it a "mellow mafia." Fair or not, the music would never be mistaken for Led Zeppelin and the lyrics were heavily influenced by the deep, introspective writing of Dylan or other folkies.

For years Jackson Browne wandered about in the land of "cult" status. He was best-known for an early hit, "Doctor My Eyes," and for co-writing the first Eagles hit "Take It Easy" with Eagles front man Glenn Frey. Despite excellent albums that were praised by both his fans and critics he could not break through to "superstar" success.

After the release of his album Late for the Sky Browne married the mother of his son, Ethan. While recording the follow-up album The Pretender Browne's wife committed suicide, leaving Browne alone to raise his son and try to mend his broken heart.

Browne later claimed that The Pretender was not a musical documentary of his wife's death and his struggle to move on. Perhaps the melancholy mood of the album makes it appear that the opposite is true. Whatever the case, The Pretender is an album of pain, and "Sleep's Dark and Silent Gate" is the most painful song of all.

The song may not be explicitly about Phyllis Browne's overdose in March 1976 but the imagery makes it difficult to conclude otherwise. The term "sleep's dark and silent gate" screams of a euphemism for death (especially given the number of cultures and religions that refer to death as "sleeping" or older songs such as Bill Monroe's "Mother's Only Sleeping"), which may be where the belief that the song was the most personal reference of Browne's heartbreak. Or it could be the literal cry in his voice when he pours out the line, "Oh, God, this is some shape I'm in." Misery and genuine grief oozes from every syllable uttered in this song, and that is one of the reasons for its greatness.

The Pretender enjoyed more success than any previous Browne album, gave him his second minor hit ("Here Come Those Tears Again"), and set him up for the superstardom that was to be his beginning with the next album (Running on Empty). The album stands in stark contrast to everything before or after it because of the personal tragedy Browne endured, best exemplified in "Sleep's Dark and Silent Gate
."

OTHER JACKSON BROWNE MUSIC TO INVESTIGATE:

The entire Late for the Sky album
-- some of Browne's best writing and one of his best rockers ("The Road and the Sky"). From start to finish it is the premiere album of Jackson Browne's career.

"These Days" (from For Everyman) -- "don't confront me with my failures, I had not forgotten them" is not only the superlative line from this song but wisdom that the wisest of philosophers did not provide us with.

"Of Missing Persons"(from Hold Out) -- a tribute to Jackson's friend, Little Feat front man Lowell George, sung to George's daughter. A wonderful memorial to a great talent we lost too early.


Saturday, October 3, 2009

Kenny Perry's Mother Dies

Category: Sports News

Kenny Perry is one of the truly nice guys on the PGA tour. The Kentucky native became a national hero during the 2008 Ryder Cup and nearly won the Masters in 2009. (Golf is one of those sports where second place is not, to the chagrin of Vince Lombardi and his famous quote, first loser.) He is also the 2009 recipient of the Payne Stewart Award.

Kenny Perry's mother, Mildred, died Thursday, October 1, in her Franklin, Kentucky home after a bout with multiple myeloma.

Perry will honor his family's request and play as scheduled in the President's Cup October 8-11.

Mildred Perry was 79.